Updated: Jun 19
Chronic pain, whether mental, emotional or physical, can make life difficult. It's never nice to experience, however, sometimes is unavoidable. If you're currently experiencing a time with more extreme levels of pain then, with the right tools, you can do to use this moment in order to create more of what you want in the future.
I've worked with people who have used pain as their excuse to stay where they are in life, somewhere they admit they don't want to be. And I've worked with people who have used pain to learn and grow and motivate themselves to get more out of life. There's one factor that determines whether or not you'll use pain to keep you stuck or to take you to a new and wonderful place. It's not money or talent or location or culture or religion or any of those things. The only thing that matters is your mindset.
Having personally suffered in the past from 10 years of chronic illness, mental and emotional turmoil and a semi-life crisis while I was a "successful" practising Pharmacist, I know it doesn't always feel like the pain is ever going to benefit us at that moment. However, the truth is that period of extreme pain has taught me things that changed my life and allowed me to create amazing health, epic relationships a passionate career and abundance in my finance.
I'm going to give you 5 tips to help you change the way you think about your current pain and help you use this moment to create a better future.
Tip #1 - Re-write your story
This is the most important thing to learn if you want to ever enjoy your life to the fullest. When we experience anything in life, we create a story and give that story meaning. Whatever we create will be true and we'll be able to justify and explain why it's the way it is because our mind and body will always work for us to make us "right," even if being right feels horrible. By changing the stories we're making up about what we're experiencing, we will literally change the experience.
For example, when I had my hair falling out from alopecia, my skin all scarred from the intense scratching from eczema, chronic headaches from cervical arthritis and breathlessness from rhinitis and asthma, my stories were pretty bleak. One story I would repeat the stories, which had also been reiterated by others I had trusted was, "My illness is chronic and genetic and I can't do anything about it." That felt true as long as that's the story I was practising. The result was that I felt stuck and simply made me a hopeless, helpless victim. I had to change my story in order to create a different reality. I stopped saying, "It's genetic, there's nothing I can do," and started saying, "my body heals all the time, maybe it can heal this." I changed my story and, over time, I created a different reality. The result of the momentum created from this simple story-change create unbelievable changes in my whole life, the first was that I healed all medical conditions in only 8 months. And that was only the beginning.
Tip #2 - Collect your evidence
If you've had a story that you've been practising for a while, it can take a little bit of time to fully believe your new story. It's really important to collect evidence that your new story is possible.
When I was very ill, it was hard to believe I could heal something I'd always believed was irreversible. I could justify and show you "all the scientific evidence" of why that story was true, but the end result was, that if that story was true, then I would have to remain sick in order to remain "right". I wanted to believe my new story, "that maybe I could heal." I had to collect new evidence. I started with my own body. I would look at bruises and papercuts and watch them heal before my very eyes. "See, my body knows how to heal," I would remind myself constantly. Also, as I had practised as a biomedical scientist, I knew a lot about the cellular make-up of cells and tissues in the body and knew that all cells have the same exact genetic material. So, then I began asking better questions. Rather than saying statements that kept my old story alive, like, "It's only going to get worse, I have to take medication for the rest of my life because there's nothing I can do," I would start asking better questions. I asked, "if every cell has the same genetic material, why can my epithelial cells (on my skin) heal, but my thyroid can't?"
Next, I collected evidence from others that had done the work before me. I read books, listened to YouTube videos, tuned into podcasts, anything where someone was sharing their story of how they healed their body. It was empowering and started to excite me! Now I was really on a roll!
"Every thought we think is creating our future." – Louise Hay
Some of the books that I read to help me on my journey include:
Bruce Lipton - Biology of Belief - click here to view
Louise Hay - You Can Heal Your Life - click here to view
Abraham Hicks - Ask & It Is Given- click here to view
Tip #3 - Let your emotions guide you
Your emotions are your internal guidance. It lets you know if the stories you're making up and repeating, are serving you or not. If you feel a bad-feeling emotion, then that story that you're practising right now does not serve you. It's your indicator that it's time to find a new story if you ever want the situation to improve. If you feel a good-feeling emotion, then that's your indicator to keep practising that story as it's working for you.
It really is that simple, however, we've not been taught that our emotions are actually one of the most powerful senses our body has. We all know that our eyes and ears are so important and their sense of the world allows us to interpret our experiences in amazing ways. But let's remember, that's all those senses are - interpretation machines. They just interpret energy. Our eyes interpret light vibration and we create a story and give it a meaning. Same with our ears, they interpret sound vibration and we create a story and give it a meaning. But no one's talking about our biggest sense of all - our emotions! They interpret vibration too, the most powerful vibration in the entire universe (that we know of for now), our thoughts. Let your emotions guide you!
Tip #4 - We need to update our story consistently
If you have a story that's not working for you right now, because it's holding you back from getting something you really want, then you will need to change your story. A few years (or days, weeks or months) later, that new story might no longer be relevant and it will be time to update it again. That's a GREAT thing because it's showing you that you're growing. We never "get it done." There really isn't an end until it's "the end." Wanting more and ever-expanding is what keeps life interesting. If you had everything you had ever wanted and could ever want.... then you're done! What else are you going to have in your life? You would feel empty and unfulfilled and without a purpose, which would probably not last very long. Having wants is really important, however, when we create a story about how horrible it is that we don't have what we want, we can create a personal hell. Maybe we have a story that we "should" be or do or have something by a certain time in our lives and that without achieving it, we're a loser or we're wrong or broken. These are all just stories that don't serve us. We need to re-write our story so that we KNOW we're always going to want something different to what we have now and that's a great thing. It doesn't mean that we need to beat up on ourselves or hate where we are in our life at this moment, it's just simply acknowledging that we want to grow, that we're ready for more.
This can be easier said than done, however, with the right tools, you can turn something that feels like stress or anxiety into something that feels like expectation and excitement. The main thing to remember is that we always need to continue assessing our stories and updating them when they no longer start to serve us.
Tip #5 - Get help!
You're not on this earth alone! There are books, podcasts, blogs, and lots of amazing things to help you on your journey. Find people that will support you on your new journey, free-thinkers, and positive-go getters. Surround yourself with the best people you can find. And if there's no one in your immediate vicinity, then go online and access the billions of people there to create your empowered tribe!
Immerse yourself with books, podcasts, TED talks, YouTube talks and interviews with people that have done what you want to achieve. Learn how they did it. Find out how they overcame their obstacles.
Lastly, coaching by someone who has done what you want to achieve is the fastest way to achieve massive success. REAL coaches (the ones who haven't just done a half-day seminar and think they're a genius), those that have done the work and learnt the lessons, have a wealth of knowledge that comes from EXPERIENCE. That's a gold mine for you! They have used their most precious asset to get the information they have - they used their time. Often a great coach has spent years, or decades, failing over and over again until reaching success. Then they can package up 10 years of work into a nice, simple course and teach you in a month or two! Wow! No matter what you're reaching for, there's an epic coach out there to help you.
I coach people on how to take back their health and relationships, two areas I've mastered over 15 years. However, I used coaches to help me in areas I'm not an expert in and allowed me to learn 30 years of knowledge to help my business and finances in only a few short years!
Some of the coaches I'd recommend for different areas:
Health - Myself (obviously lol)
Business - I like to keep it local when I'm talking about starting up a business. If I was in the USA, I'd definitely go for a coach from Tony Robbins or Jack Canfield. However, being in Australia means we have different markets, wants and resources. I found The Entourage years - website here - ago when I was just starting and immediately resonated with the founder, Jack Delosa. I saw him live in Perth and initially didn't even know he was the founder when he came on stage. He was so young but the minute he opened his mouth I knew he was special. His authenticity and passion to help people under 40 start and succeed in business was palpable! If you want to get 10 years of "trial and error" into a few years, then coaching with his team is what I recommend. Looking back, I wish I'd continued on because being cheap and saving myself a few thousand was such a silly decision for me. I have been "going it alone" for many years now and I'll tell you, mindset and health are my specialities, business was not! I learnt it the hard way! Now I know that I could have done what I took 5 years to do in probably 6 months with the right coach!
Finances - Tony Robbins is a HUGE inspiration to me. He's mastered business and finances, I've gone to real-life seminars and I've read all his books, listen to all his audio and continue to listen to him almost every day just on interviews or podcasts to keep myself immersed with his extraordinary philosophy and energy. If you haven't already, I recommend reading or listening to the audiobook of his "Awaken the Giant Within" - link here.
You got this
Remember to give yourself a break! You may have been practising some of these stories for many decades and would have collected a lot of evidence as to why they're true. However, they will only remain true for you if you keep practising them. You can choose to practise a new story at any time. If you can choose just one story and transform it into a more empowering one, your whole life can begin to change in an instant. So what are you waiting for? You got this!