Feel the fear and do it anyway- an epic way to “fall forward” into success
Fear is a magical feeling. It can be scary and intimidating; however it can also be exciting and when we overcome it, can even make us feel exhilaration beyond anything else! Many people are afraid to feel fear (is this ironic?....anyway). So deconstructing the feeling can be helpful in overcoming your fears. The first thing to acknowledge before we can overcome our fear is the question, “why do we feel fear?”
This is a great question. We feel fear for two main reasons, the first is for self preservation. If our safety is in danger, then we will get a feeling of fear to ensure we take action to protect ourselves, many call this instinct or intuition. It's the feeling where you walk the same way home everyday and feel fine and then one day you walk that way and feel the hairs stand up on the back of your neck and you just know that today is not a day to dilly dally (just quietly, that is the best saying ever, “dilly dally”). That is what I label “true fear” as it's purpose is to protect us and is actually aligned with our wellbeing. True fear is also the least common fear most of us experience. The second main reason we feel fear is due to limiting beliefs. This is the fear that many of us feel on a daily basis and it DOES NOT SERVE US. Mindsets that do not serve us and hold us back from achieving what we really want in life can make us feel fearful when we are about to go for opportunities that can result in massive, wanted, growth in our life. Beliefs like, “what if I fail,” or “I'm not good enough.” These beliefs can hold you back from going for what you want in life and quite simply (I repeat) do not serve you! In this case “FEAR” is “False Evidence Appearing Real.” These beliefs will run through your subconscious when you go to do something you want in order to achieve more in your life and make you feel FEAR, which does not truly exist outside of your belief system. Simply changing your perspective through your mindset will literally rewire this feeling from FEAR to excitement. Actually, I always say that in this case the only difference between FEAR and excitement is your breath. Breathe consciously, relax and shift your mindset to one that serves you.
When you want that new job and you do not even apply, ask yourself “why not?” What beliefs did you tell yourself to hold you back? When you want that rocking body and you eat that cake and feel guilty about it, ask yourself, “why did I do that?” When you want to do a back flip and you always find an excuse why you can't come to the gym class or train with your gymnastic coach, ask yourself, “why would I turn down the opportunity to learn what I said I wanted?” It's always the same answers. The thought patterns that run “behind the scenes,” in the infamous subconscious mind, what are they saying to you? How do they make you feel? Are they setting you up to fail before you even tried? If you think, “what if I fail?” then answer with a “SO WHAT!! I will fail forward! I will learn more skills and do better next time. The more I persist, the better I will become – that’s a fact!” Babies don’t take a step, fall down and then give up! They fall down, LAUGH (that’s why they are smarter than most adults, they know they will succeed so they can find the fun in, so called, failure) and try again. And again. And again! Until they finally get it. So why do we stop doing this when we “grow up?” When do we start to adopted the “I can't” attitude and let FEAR rule us? Be conscious of these things that hold you back. That is the first step to overcoming it!
The goal is not to feel FEAR, this feeling can actually serve us when it is linked to empowering belief systems. When we feel FEAR, this is a fantastic thing! In fact, FEAR is the BEST feeling we can feel because it tells us we are about to grow our soul to a level we have never before experienced! Isn’t that exciting? Think about it. When we try something new and finally master it, it feels absolutely amazing…for a little while. Then one day we do it and we don’t even acknowledge it at all. We don’t feel the elation of success, it's just now an expectation and that's good too, it means you have mastered it and it's time to grow in new ways. Just remember the first time you rode a bike. The first few times you ate pavement and it was scary and you just kept getting back on until that sweet moment where you're riding and dad lets go of the bike and he's smiling, yelling, “you're doing it!! You're doing it!!” and you feel wonderful and free and accomplished. And then soon enough you're on your bike and you ride around and you just feel expectant. Of cause you can ride a bike, you’ve been riding for years. It's not complacency, it's growth. Once you master something, you should expect that you can do that thing, because you can and you're awesome. However the real fun, that insanely great, exhilarating feeling comes from that first state of success. That first moment of accomplishment. That’s why we all want to grow on a soul level. To find those states of exhilaration. The thing is, when we are on the precipice of these growth states we will feel a feeling that we have often labelled FEAR, and because of the mental chatter that can go along with this feeling, it holds us back from trying and thus holds us back from continued, accelerated growth that will result in insanely awesome feelings of accomplishment and satisfaction.
Me learning to ride a motorcycle- felt the FEAR for years, yet my desire to learn was strong. Had my first professional lesson and it was AMAZING!!! I absolutely love riding, if I had let the FEAR win, I would have missed out on the feelings of freedom, excitement, adventure and exhilaration that I now get when I ride! It pays to feel the FEAR and do it anyway. I make a conscious practice of pushing through whenever I feel FEAR on everything, even the small things. Actually, ESPECIALLY the small things! Like saying I don't like something or that I would prefer something else, even though I may feel slight FEAR of judgment or being disliked for asking for what I want, however by practicing on these little things, it stabilises my empowering habit of "feeling the FEAR and doing it anyway" and allows me to do it when the FEAR is more intense, as in riding a 100 kg beast at 100 kms down the freeway!
So next time you feel fear, ask yourself if it's true fear or if it's just FEAR. If you acknowledge that it's just "False Evidence Appearing Real", then get excited because you are on the precipice of achieving something great. You are ready and your soul is wanting for new growth, which will lead you to more of what you want in your reality. This feeling can be felt in any area of your life. New relationships, reigniting old relationships, health, finances, business opportunities. Telling that person that you “love them” for the first time, quitting your job to travel for a year and following your passion, joining that new training group at the gym, buying your first home. No matter what the situation, you can choose to feel FEAR, or you can consciously turn that feeling in to anticipated excitement. There are tools and techniques to do this easily, finding yourself a good Energy Guide can accelerate the process, however you can follow these steps to help yourself right now.
Steps to feel the fear and do it anyway:
1. Acknowledge that it is FEAR (and not “true fear”)
2. Acknowledge what the worst thing that could happen could be. Actively acknowledging this out loud or writing this down will actually take away most of it's power (sounds bizarre right? Try it and see!)
3. Acknowledge what’s the BEST thing that could happen from this - hold this as your core focus, your "Why"
4. List examples of your victories – when have you felt the FEAR, done it anyway and it has worked out amazing, even better than you had dreamed of, in most cases? I call is called, “collecting your evidence”
5. Visualise what it would feel like, look like, taste like, smell like etc when you achieve this goal. If you're visualising correctly you should literally be able to feel the excitement and satisfaction of that thing already coming into your reality as if it already has
6. Break it down into small, manageable pieces that you can check off easily. Set rewards for each time you succeed each check point – the goal itself is NOT THE REWARD. In order to consciously lock down the habit of success we must positively reward our brains for finding the solutions. This must be done by rewards that are separate from the overall goal. Eg, if you are saving for a holiday and have a goal to save $5000. Then your check points might be at each grand. The rewards could be as simple as “have a celebratory goddess bath, with candles and essential oils” all the way to “buy a new set of luggage for my trip that is swanky as fuck!”
7. Start!! You have to take action, make sure it is inspired and comes from a gut/heart centre of guidance
8. Celebrate your wins. Every single time you check off a piece of the puzzle, then celebrate – and celebrate hard. Make sure you implement your predetermined rewards.
9. When you are 90% there to your overall goal, set a new goal!! Your success is inevitable with consistent focus, so when you are getting close, make sure you push that goal out further to keep you moving forward. You never want to get it done. That’s not the fun part. The fun is in the journey. In the intense satisfaction of your evidence that you always get what you want when you focus positively on it.
Go out and smash those FEARS my beauties! You are magnificent and you can do what ever the hell you set your mind to! I can't wait to see the wonders you create.
Sending you loads of love, as always.
Master Energy Guide - PT for your Soul